june 6th 2016
“Sometimes doing your best is not good enough. Sometimes you must do what is required.”
Today I took a hit, a huge hit that not only staggered me, but broke me…
For close to a year now I’ve wanted to participate in the Monbukagakusho scholarship at the start of the 2017 school year, I wanted to study Mechatronic engineering in Japan following my access course; but I didn’t know I was lying to myself. It turns out that all foreign students have to take an entrance exam, in which you have to pick two sciences out of the three cardinal subjects, to be tested on.
My course will only teach me one, and maths.
There’s always one more… One more FUCKING hoop to jump through! So now, if I want to have any chance at all of studying in Japan I’m going to have to learn the whole Maths, Physics and Chemistry syllabus in two years. That might not sound like such a problem, well, it wouldn’t be IF I WERE PERMITTED TO DO A-LEVELS! And that’s if I even pass the interview.
What that boils down to is, if I want to stand any chance at all, I’ll have to learn at least one fully syllabus next year, in college, and provided I pass the interview and they send me over there, I’ll have to learn the remaining one and a half syllabus on my own time whilst learning the language. But fuck it!!! Why not!!! Because it’s been such a leisurely stroll thus far, why not add even more shit for me to contend with!!!
I’m so fucking done…
Is it doable? Yes. Will I do it? That depends on whether I’m accepted or not. If I’m not accepted onto the scholarship I’ll be stuck here for another four years until I get my degree and then I’ll have to try again for my post grad or PhD.
In any case this whole ordeal has left a foul taste in my mouth and I don’t fancy dwelling on it much more, such bullshit…