Day 11: Biking

June 5th 2016

Following yesterday’s encounter with Steph I was supposed to meet up with her today to start the Couch to 5k challenge, ‘supposed’ being the operative word. Following the worsening of my knee’s condition I decided that I should look into it a little more; aside from developing crepitus in my right knee, no doubt a side effect of the torn meniscus, I discovered that I am to keep away from impact exercises.


Avoid them like the plague.

Understandably I couldn’t run alongside her… but that doesn’t mean that I was just going park-06to leave her to jog alone. No, I had a better idea. I was going to bike next to her. I know better than most that running on your own can be an overwhelmingly monotonous and uncomfortable task. You’ve got no one to pace yourself against, no one to talk to and, empirically all you’re doing is running when your body is hurting. Not such a fun time is it?

I don’t think that Steph was too happy when I showed up on my bike, but I think, I hope, that she understood after seeing that I’m wearing a neoprene sleeve on my knee to support it until I get treatment. Looks like i got off scott free!

The warmup started with a five minutes brisk walk, that felt more like ten considering the difficulty of balancing on a bike at such a slow speed before picking up, very slightly; the rest of the session was spent alternating between thirty seconds of running and one minute of walking. It was only the first run on the first week bearing in mind. I would like to think that I could have contended with it without breaking into a sweat…

I would like to, but I don’t think that I could.

The run seemed to last longer than it was supposed to, I’m not sure whether Steph was looking to run further than we had initially discussed or whether she simply lost track of mountain bikethe time; not that it mattered to me on my bike. The bike I use is a big, heavy, mountain bike meant for throwing around dirt paths and off-road trails, it’s not as easy as you might expect to keep it moving along side a runner.

I’m supposed to be going running with her in two days time as well, but if I’m being realistic, I don’t see that happening. I’m more than willing to bike alongside her again and keep her company, so that’s what I’ll probably end up doing- we’ll just have to hope the weather permits.

Thank you for reading.


Day 179: Civilisation V

May 11th 2016

With the advent of Civilisation VI coming in the immediate future I decided to give Civilisation V one last hurrah and start up a game with a friend. Now I understand that Civ VI comes out in October, but I really wouldn’t be surprised If me and my fried had only completed one or two games in that time, and we’re only playing on the standard length setting.

Civilisation will devour your time

There’s even a setting for Civilisation that sets the game speed so that, and I quote, “One era will be comprised of roughly the same amount of terms as an entire game” and it is staggeringly slow.

With that in mind though, I would probably be idiotic to set the game to that length, I’d still be playing Civ V by the time Civ VII was announced, it would be horrible. It even feels weird to say that because of how dear to my heart the Civ series is, in fact anything made by Sid Meier is pretty much gold.

I don’t really have a lot to say about today, nothing much went on and I’m bracing myself for when Warhammer Total War hits, because as soon as that hits I will be almost completely unavailable for about a month- no joke.

All of today was spend on Civilisation; I wasted today and I’m wasting more time, I can’t seem to stop and I’m so fucking angry with myself about it.

I need help.

Day 177: Meditation

May 9th 2016

Getting up early never suited me, it never has and it more than likely never will, so you can imagine that having to be up at half six in the morning just to make an eight O’clock appointment where I wasn’t even sure what I was getting myself into, did not sit well with me… not in the least.

Unlike yesterday the weather was not on my side and I was practically waterlogged before I even stepped foot on a bus; cold wet and shivering I eventually got into town and met Mr. Li who, despite the rough weather, looked like he was actually rather content, though perhaps he was just glad to see I actually showed up. I’m not saying that he might have tried to introducce people to this place before, but if that’s the case, I wouldn’t be surprised.

I make it sound like indoctrination.

Eventually we got inside and there was a gentleman sitting on a stool at the head of an audience, though if I was forced to make a generalisation, none of them looked as though they were Buddhists and, in hindsight, I might have been right.

The man was apparently a retired professor, a religious scholar who was there to deliver a talk on “The position and role of women in Buddhism”. I was intrigued to say the least. The whole thing lasted for about two hours and it was a thoroughly eye opening experience, I’ve read the three baskets of the Tripitaka but it’s been such a long time since then, I think I needed a refresher course.

The content of the ‘lecture’ might be a bit too boring for me to talk about here, it didn’t help that he had a horrendously monotone voice either, but it was informative, well thought out and reasoned, so I suppose that I could classify it as a morning well spent. A morning or learning and culture.

Of course this wasn’t the every day function of the (temple?) meditation space, in day to day activity it pretty much does what it says on the tin, it’s a place for people to come, ponder over the days events and meditate. I do believe that I will be going back some time soon, perhaps I’ll be able to chat to someone ‘official’ about what they think of Buddhism and its role in every day life to them.

Thank you for reading.

Day 176: Exploring

May 8th 2016

Today I went on a bit of a ramble, I just grabbed my phone and keys and strolled out the door hoping to find something that would interest and engage me in the city center; I assure you I wasn’t disappointed.

The day started off pretty slowly, waking up as usual and having a slow breakfast before figuring out what I wanted to do with my day and, considering my phone has usually rung by this time with a friend in need on the other end, I figured today would be another lazy day. I was discontented with that Idea suffice to say and, after breakfast, decided to grab my coat, keys and phone and just stroll out the door.

The walk into town was nice in actuality, being that I hail from the land of wind and rain I park-06half expected the heavens to open but, much to my delight, the grey clouds dissipated and were replaced with puffy white ones that punctuated an otherwise blue sky. It sucked that I still had to carry my coat around though.

Eventually I wound up in the park, having had an otherwise unfruitful search, and was greeted unexpectedly by an elderly gentleman who handed me my coat, evidently it had slipped off of the back of the bench I was sitting on. He took a seat next to me and made the passing comment: “You look a little lost” and I, being the asshat that I am, retorted with the proverb, “Not all that wander are lost”.

What is wrong with me?

 Dharma_Wheel.svgHe chuckled and asked my to follow him and, ignoring that fact that this could be a window to a violent sexual assault, I walked with him and queried him on where we were going, something he never told me until we arrived. It was about a ten minute walk and at its zenith we approached a Buddhist meditation center. He invited me in.

I was understandably curious, I know that there are quite a large amount of Buddhists around the world and thus they will have places of reverence, worship and meditation but you never really see them; I ask you, when was the last time that you passed one? I’d wager you can’t remember because, today withstanding, I certainly can’t.

The room was empty except for a few people who looked as if they were cleaning the establishment and he made me understand that there would be people here tomorrow at eight in the morning, if I was interested in coming down to see what it was all about, to which I replied with a vehement.

Mission accomplished, adventure found!

Day 175: F-list and Second Life

May 7th 2016

I make it no secret that I am a furry, I’m not ashamed of it despite the stigma that the internet and numerous documentaries have attached to the fandom, and I’m also not ashamed to say that I sometimes like to indulge in the kinkier sides of the fandom; it’s a fetish, like anything else. Let’s look at what that term means first though.

One of the many Brit-Fur symbols


A Fetish

Google defines fetishes as such:

a form of sexual desire in which gratification is linked to an abnormal degree to a particular object, item of clothing, part of the body, etc.

For the most part Google usually has an excellent definition of words but in this instance I feel that it is somewhat lacking; in my opinion a ‘fetish’ is: deriving sexual excitement of pleasure from items, experiences, images or sensations that are inherently not, in and of themselves, sexual, i.e: Furries.

This isn’t to say, however, that I go around popping a boner every time I see a piece of furry art or I get all tingley whenever I see a furry avatar on a game, of course not, it works like any other fetish and you’ve got to be in the right place at the right time, but I digress.

The reason for that disclosure is because it serves as a baseline of knowledge for todays activities which were, rewriting my Second Life profile and F-list. Readers of this blog will already know what Second Life is but F-list is more of a mystery.


F-list, in simplest term, is a platform for furries who are interested in both RP and ERP (Role Play and Erotic Role Play respectively) and offers users a very clear, very easy to digest, medium from which to find compatible partners; a further comment I’d like to proffer is that I’ve been on RP websites since I was about thirteen and F-list is the best website for it that i have EVER seen. I would recommend it to anyone.

I spent a lot of the day browsing through pages that had been long since abandoned and, considering their new use to me, decided that they deserved some sprucing up. Now at the end of the day I can safely say that was a day well spent and my efforts are already reaping rewards.

Thank you for reading.

Day 171: The Vic

May 3rd 2016

There’s a somewhat upscale pub in my area called “The Victoria” and, over the past few months, it has become somewhere that me and my friends will go if we decide that we want to not only have a few drinks, but also want to couple that with a reasonably priced and delicious three course meal. For those of us who aren’t overly flush with cash (i.e: myself and all of my friends) a fixed price menu is an absolute lifesaver.

Since the Bierkeller was closed tonight we decided that we should all go out for a meal; any excuse to have some good food and drink is what I say. We got there at around one O’clock, since we knew we’d be there for the duration we ordered lunch as soon as we got through the door.


I opted for pan fried steak (blue) on ciabatta and a small cheese board for afters, and that only came to twelve pounds, so factoring in that you got a free drink (on tap) with your meal that worked out really well. It took us about an hour and a half to finish that up and by that time we were all ready for another drink so I moved onto ‘shorts’ (any spirit) whilst the remainder of my friends stuck with beer and cider.
We chatted and laughed, making the most of the sun out in the beer garden before coming beer-garden-01in as it began to get more chill in the evening where we then ordered out main courses. A three course meal only set us back fifteen quid each, so that wasn’t too bad.

I opted for: Mushroom soup for starters, followed by fish pie and finally a chocolate brownie desert- I haven’t eaten that well in months. The real kicker to all of this was that I didn’t really want to spend a lot of money going out drinking, it’s quite tight at the moment, but, in actuality, I spent more than I would have done if we’d just gone to a bar!

but life is for living I suppose

Thank you for reading.

Day 170:Lazy Day

May 2nd 2016

It’s Monday and today was unusually quiet. I’ve mentioned before that, usually, a friend will contact me and ask for my help with something, or they’ll send me a text asking whether I want to go out with them, something like that and it always makes days feel so slow and boring when that doesn’t happen.

Nothing happened today

I got up decently early at nine O’clock and padded downstairs, hungry for breakfast; when I have time in the morning my standard fare usually consists of: Bacon, Eggs and whatever vegetables I have, usually fried or, in the case of the egg, poached on toast. I’m not known for being a delicatessen, quite the opposite, closer to a viking berserker in fact, I’ll eat anything, even if it’s charred to high heaven (which it often is).

I’m not the best cook.

After charring breakfast so badly it resembled coal I decided that I would work on this blog, since I’m still ten days behind due to… unforeseen circumstances. Unfortunately I didn’t get chance to publish a blog post apparently, mainly because I’m writing it now.

Following this was lunch and it was a damn sight better than breakfast, I managed to make cream of mushroom soup, substituting the vegetable stock for chicken stock actually made all the difference. Thank you Ainsley Harriott.

I had the soup for dinner too with a slice or two of toast, nothing too fancy, just enough to fill you up and, after this, i retired for the night to spend some time on Second Life, nothing happened today and that kind of reflects in my lethargy in this post and the lack of content.

Some days are slower than others


Day 169: Goals!

May 1st 2016

I’ve been accused of flip-flopping in the past, setting my sights on one goal only to stop and move on to another, rarely succeeding in achieving either one, I’ve always rejected these statements, maintaining that I’m working on doing more than one thing at a time. I still reject their criticisms but I see now that they may have had a point.

assessing your goals and objectives regularly is an efficient way to make sure you’re staying on track, but it only works if you have grander’ goals that you’re working towards and the objectives you’re changing are done so in the pursuit of this greater goal. I’ll start by stating the big goals that I wish to achieve and accompany them with a little explanation as to why. Let’s begin…



I’ve always wanted to learn another language, but of recent that fascination has been made manifest in the form of Japanese. The reason behind this is two-fold. One: I want to study in Japan since it’s the birthplace of mechatronic engineering, the best universities in the world for my subject are all situated on that sliver of an island and, whilst I’m beginning to see that I won’t be able to study there for my undergrad degree, my hopes remain high for a post grad degree. Two: over forty percent of the worlds animation and visual novels are spoke and written in Japanese, animation is a personal preference of mine, I love it and as for visual novels, my sentiments are the same and if i could I’d read them all!

Those are the main reasons I would like to be able to read and speak the language.



The piano is something that  I’ve always wanted to play, what other instrument can you think of that is subject to such aggrandizement and prestige other than the piano? Couple this with it being the only instrument, that I can think of, to be out in areas such as hotel lounges, bars and halls for the public to use, it’s a lovely thought to be able to fill the air with music from memory. It takes skill, practice and it’s something that I’ve wanted to do since I was little, this is an absolute must.



You’ve no doubt heard the term “Manners maketh man”  well you could hijack this term to read as, muscles maketh man; they of course do not but the wording serves my purpose of explaining why this is a goal quite nicely. I’ve always been spindly, a skinny little wreck of a man and have never been in possession of strength or an aesthetically pleasing physique and the reason why this is important to me is as such: I want it.

It’s really plain and simple, I want to be strong enough to protect myself, to be able to carry out strenuous activity and I want to be pleasing to the eye because, in all honesty, it makes having romantic liaisons ‘easier’, not easy, but easier. I want to be as confident in my body as I am in my mind and I feel as though this will only aid in that desire.



I want to be able to fight, I’m pretty handy as it is but most of my fighting is oriented around blades and, whilst effective, that’s a quick way to land yourself in prison. Carrying knives over three inches or that aren’t folding knives is an illegal offence and can land you in prison for up to four years with a hefty fine attached too.

No, I’d like to be able to fight with my fists, something very punchy and visceral like Krav Maga. The reason for that is as such, I used to be the kind of person that was of the opinion that you shouldn’t hit anyone unless you’re attacked first; how naive I was to think that, now I’m an advocate of the mentality that: If you know a fight will happen, HIT FIRST AND HIT HARDEST! It’s saved my ass more than once.

Becoming Smarter

learning 2

This one is more vague than the rest, there’s more to it. When I was in high school I would have classified myself as an academic elitist, I believed that some subjects were more valuable than others and that the less valuable subjects (such as RE, PSHCE and the arts, at the time) should be eschewed in the pursuit of more important subjects like the sciences. How naive I was…

Now I understand that the most learned of individuals are those who’s mastery spans over a number of subjects, giants who can straddle vastly different subjects with ease and draw on complex bodies of knowledge to solve problems, polymaths. Whilst my goal is to become a polymath I am not one now, nor will I be one for at least a decade- I’m a philomath, a knowledge seeker and, at the moment, accessing classes and reading material on a range of varying topics are the best way to achieve this goal.

Those are my goals, thank you for reading.

Day 168:Off The Rails

April 30th 2016

My notes on what happened on this day are a little sparse, which I can only intuit as meaning that a great deal of nothing happened today. With that in mind I think it might be prudent to use today’s post as something of a sounding board with which to explore the notion of why the past hundred and sixty days or so have been very trying.

First off I’m lazy, which makes any endeavor, no matter how big or small, immediately more difficult, I’m hard to motivate and, byextension, I get sidetracked by things that would grant me more immediate catharsis easily. I am working to combat this but, if I’m being frank, I’ve had no success.


Everyone goes off of the rails at some point, they do things that they’re not proud of and they stagnate for periods of time, it’s part of life, everyone makes mistakes and not everything goes smoothly, it’s part of what makes us human. What really matters isn’t that you fell or that you’ve stumbled, what matters is how you drag yourself up off of the ground and keep pushing forwards- you’ve not lost until you give up.

I NEVER intend to give up.


I said it yesterday and I’ll say it again today, nothing worth having is easy; if you want to be smarter, you’ve got to read and read and read, practice and implement! Hard. If you want to be stronger, you’ve got to eat, exercise and drive through the pain to forge the physique you want! Hard. Learning how to cook, how to code or even something like learning to swim, none of these endeavors are easy, but they’re all worth the pain, you’ve got to shrug it off and keep going, if you don’t, you might as well be dead.

Never give up.

Day 167:Resuming Schedule

April 29th 2016

Today I finally got back to learning Japanese, it’s clear now that over the past few months my learning has been heavily impeded by a venomous combination of lethargy and depression, time to combat that actively. I’m very behind on my blogs as well, but much like with my learning, it’s time to combat that actively as well, as I’m writing this I’m transcribing the hand written notes of the day and, well, I need to write some more blog posts since I don’t think that my desk can get any more cluttered with them…

So here goes

Freemason LeatherI woke up pretty early, some time around nine O’clock and rather promptly hopped on the PC, like usual. I’d had contact from the Free Masons and was supposed to contact the head Mason regarding my application. I didn’t. I forgot to do so and put it the the back of my mind like I do with a lot of small tasks in my life. Following this I decided that it would be prompt to revise some of my Japanese on Memrise.

It looks as though I’ve let myself slip a little since I could scarcely remember more than half of the words I’ve learned; the symbols for Hiragana came more naturally though, the only two that I got confused were “Re” and “Ne”- they look very similar.Other than that I’ve pretty much got everything on pat, coupled with a read through Genki 1, and learning how to use the words: Kore, Sore,  Are, Dore, Kono, Sono and, Ano, and the correct particles to use in conjunction with them.

It’s a slow road and, I admit, I wish that I was further along it at this moment in time, but I have nothing and no one to blame but myself and my lack of self control, I’m empirically flawed because of my work ethic, but nothing worth having is easy, so I guess I’ll just have to bite down and plow through it.

It’s been a tough day today.